Dear Sasuke
by Who really Knows
Summary: Naruto is about to move to a new town, and start a whole new life. But before he can do that he has one last thing to take care of; with a meddling teacher, an arguementive friend, and an ass-face all interfering in some way or another how will things quickly get turned upside down. YAOI SASUNARU but for some reason some KakashiXiruka sneaked into the plot...
1. Chapter 1

**This is just a random thing I came up with for no apparent reason? No really, I was cooking eggs…..I mean what does that have to do with this? NOTHIN! Lol**

**A/N~ Any misspelled or grammar errors in the letters are there on purpose. If you spot them anywhere else, then it's an error and I would appreciate it if you would point them out for me.**

**Let me know how it goes**

**Letter #One**

_Dear Ass-Face, _

_I sincerely hope you crawl in a whole and die, you stupid bastard. Fuck you, fuck your family, fuck yourself, fuck your friends, and fuck it all. Have a terrible fucking life and go rot in a fucking whole. _

_Sincerely,_

_Naruto you bitch._

"Naruto…..this sucks."

"What?! I worked on that all day!"

"You worked on this all day? Dude, I've wiped my ass with better letters than this."

"I didn't even know you wiped your ass now."

"You're the one who failed kindergarten, look you didn't even spell hole right."

"FUCK YOU FAGGOT!"

"Alright that's enough." Interrupted an exasperated teacher from above the pair of arguing students, it was the middle of class but everyone was busy mingling around in their seats as they chattered about various dull topics that didn't nearly catch his attention as much as this, "Let me see the letter."

"Uhhhh…" Naruto held the letter close to his chest, trying to push it down into his shirt, but his teacher swiped the paper before he could even think about it. He watched in horror as Mr. Hatake scanned the words line for line; beside him Kiba's eyes flickered around praying to the powers that be to save him from an ass-whipping.

"This is terrible." Kakashi concluded, setting the paper down, reaching behind him he pulled up a nearby chair to their desk and pulled out the pen from his pants pocket, he began circling and underlying with heated passion. "This is for Sasuke right? I've heard you yell at him in the halls a few times with more passion than this. Naruto, when you write you need to clearly convey your thoughts to the reader. That means more description, better vocabulary, and spelling is always important."

"Well, what do you want me to do about it?" Naruto groaned, pulling the paper back towards him with a frown. "Writing is hard."

"Why are you writing in the first place?" inquired Kakashi, taking in the sudden quick look of sadness that flashed on Kiba's face for a brief moment.

"Well, I'm moving a few months…..and I just want to stick it to him." Naruto explained as the words on the page seemed to swirl with the red ink of his teacher's corrective pen until they swirled into the bastard's image, glaring from the page he pointed at him with a pointed challenge. "I really want to stick it to him."

Kakashi examined his student's glaring face, sighing as he leaned back with his feet perching on the desk in front of him, "I'll tell you what Naruto, if you can write a letter that impresses me before you leave, then I will replace every bad grade in the grade book that you have with nearly perfect marks. I'll help you write something for him."

"What?!" simultaneously roared Naruto and Kiba, Kakashi only chuckled. "Is that even possible?"

"Well….there is a danger to it." The teacher answered, "But I don't really need to be an English teacher, and I have plenty of money from my books."

"Well then why do you bother to hang around this place?" Kiba answered with a shrug, gesturing around to people, "Don't tell me it's the wonderful opportunity to expand the minds of your loving students."

Once again, Kakashi only chuckled, his eyes drifting to the wall next to him where the faint yell of a furious Iruka could be heard from the other side. "I have my reasons…so are you in or not?"

Naruto thought about it, good grades was something he couldn't pass up and would Kakashi even get caught? He had to admit his teacher was crafty. "Fine, I'll do it."

Smiling, his teacher only said one thing. "Beautiful."

* * *

Sasuke;

English; it was the last period of the day, and Sasuke was already so bored. All everyone ever did in this class was sit around and chat about ridiculous things, and their teacher just sat at his desk with his feet up and his nose in a book. What a joke.

The bell rang, freeing him finally, "Sasuke stay behind for a minute."

He considered just leaving anyway, but Kakashi was persistent just like freaking Sakura. If the teacher wanted to have a chat with him, then it was an absolute guarantee it was going to happen no matter what. Sasuke remembered when he challenged the teacher at the beginning of the year and ignored him, the guy showed up at his house with a pie and a smile that could only be seen in his eyes, effectively warming his way into the house by his pure skill of sweet-talking.

Grudgingly, Sasuke resisted the urge to slouch over and instead confidently strode over with his back held straight up and his dignity intact. Standing in front of the white-haired male, he only stared at the turning pages of the book, not bothering to make any form of contact as he spoke. "I have a proposition for you."

"Hn." What proposition could Kakashi possibly offer? There wasn't anything in the world the teacher could provide for his goals in the future, if it weren't for the insistence of the school and his parental figures, Sasuke Uchia wouldn't be here.

"Well Sasuke, I just thought you might be interested to know that you didn't do so well on your major grade essay." With one hand and his eye still scanning the pages of his book, Kakashi opened a drawer and revealed a familiar set of papers. "You know the one worth practically your whole grade."

A green smiley face mocked him next to a bright red 34, gritting his teeth he could only glare at Kakashi who flipped another page. Finally, the one eye poking out from behind the weird mask peered at him with a bored expression, "As a teacher, I just thought I might celebrate your imperfections just as much as your successes. This is a great opportunity for you to grow some more Sasuke, and learn that you too can misinterpret the true concepts being asked. You failed to properly answer the point, and you also failed to use a variety of sentence structures with a heightened sense of vocabulary. It was dull, tasteless, and boring."

The paper crumbled under the pressure of his fingers as he continued to glare at the glowing teacher; how could he not have answered the question properly? It was simple; analyze the abilities of perception. What was so hard about that? It was more of an opinion question than something that could be answered outright, and even then there were sources to draw from.

"So Sasuke, I will give you an assignment to make up for it, another sort of paper to replace this grade." With a smile Kakashi set the book into his lap and simply stared at the anger radiating off his student. "I want you to write me a letter, well not me really, how should I put this? I want you to write a letter to Naruto Uzumaki, about anything that you want. Show me the letter and then give it to him within the month. Then Sasuke, you'll have your grade."

"Write a letter to Naruto?" he was dead, this was definitely hell. How was a letter to the Dobe of all Dobe's supposed to amount to anything, knowing Kakashi he can't write just anything either.

"I know about your relationship with him, it's a poor one without any real explanation. You owe him that at least." Was all Kakashi replied, and with that Sasuke turned with a much brisker walk, slamming his way through the door as his way of accepting the proposal.

How could Sasuke have known that there was an innocent mistake on his prompt? How could he have known that everyone else had a prompt reading; analyze the abilities of your own perception? How could he have known his teacher would make such a mistake?

Or maybe, for the teacher at least, there was no mistake at all.

* * *

_Dear Dobe, _

…_._

Sasuke groaned into his keyboard, eyeing the screen. What was there to write? Kakashi, that asshole, he just enjoys these games of his. Writing a letter to Naruto isn't the problem, but writing a letter that would impress Kakashi; that was a problem.

Maybe he should start out differently.

Deleting his frustration until only "Dear" was left on the page, he had to get the juices flowing; he had to think of something, anything.

_Dear Naruto, _

_You are…. _

Naruto was what? Annoying, disturbing, pathetic, retarded, and an ultimately all around disgusting person; that seemed like a wide range of vocabulary for Kakashi to read at least, but it would fail to impress him.

_Dear Naruto,_

_You are….I have to write you this letter because Kakashi is an idiot, who failed me because he has sick…._

No, no that wouldn't work. Kakashi might even giggle while reading that, and Sasuke did not want to please his teacher. Instead he resolved to delete everything until he reached "You are…" what could he say? And more importantly, what did Kakashi want him to say?

All questions he shouldn't have really been asking.

**THE END no just kidding, but review~! Also I haven't given up on any other stories I'm just being incredibly lazy**


	2. Chapter 2

**It really sucked that my first reviewer was someone who was just like "Your title is violating the rules. Reported!" I mean really I just have a question, why the !, I mean are u actually excited that u caught something O-o Or…..what? Not even being sarcastic, being serious O-o But I honestly didn't even mean for the title to start out as Dear Ass-Face XDDD it just happened because I was super tired and that's what the first letter says, but it was supposed to be different because…well I can't really tell you why but maybe you'll predict.**

**A ****bearhumpinghoneyeatingslapper**** approved message. (and I didn't want another spanking…)**

**Anyway, I know this one is short but longer ones are coming trust me, let me know if you notice any mistakes outside of the letters, and also! I have to say that this chapter was very fun to write**

**ON WITH THE STORY**

* * *

**Letter #2**

_Dear Ass-Face, _

_You make me so testy, I want to viscous you apart. This admimadivesion is brackish at best. You are a bastard._

_Sincerely, Naruto you bitch_

Naruto stared on at his teacher, who only released a sigh of disappointment. "Naruto…this isn't going to cut it at all. You still have misspelled words, and your vocabulary is incorrect. Not just that but the letter is not descriptive enough at all. Where is the hate Naruto? What's Sasuke going to think reading this? Your last letter was better than this!"

"But….." he frowned as he snatched the paper away, scanning over the words, "I thought this one was going to be at least a bit better! I worked so hard on it, well I had Shikamaru help me, but he was talking faster than usual and I didn't even write everything he said, I kind of just wrote down the smart words and tried to put them together."

His teacher sighed, rubbing his temples as he stared down at the stupid typed words. This was going to be far more difficult than both Naruto and Kakashi had ever anticipated. The teacher eyed his student through his fingers; what was keeping the blonde from unleashing feelings swarming around inside when he faces Sasuke each day?

Oh wait, of course. "Naruto, I'm going to assign you someone to tutor."

"What?! Tutor?!" Naruto complained, "Mr. Hatake how am I supposed to help someone with writing when my own grades are terrible! That's too much; there isn't enough time in a day for that!"

"Well to bad." His teacher remained firm as he stared up at his student, "You will be here every Tuesday and Thursday afterschool to tutor or I'll call off the deal. End of story."

Naruto released a growl as his jaw tightened; he snatched the paper back and examined his own words. "You're too much!"

Kakashi only waved him away with a faint smirk playing on his features, "Well…" he said, "This will be fun."

* * *

Sasuke really wasn't sure what he was looking at….or why he was looking.

Poor stormed in the room moments earlier with a noise complaint; apparently some of the children in Sasuke's classroom were banging against the walls. Only that wasn't true, it was really just Kakashi slapping the wall with a broom while everyone other than Sasuke sat around doing their usual activities. He guessed that was probably the only upside to this class; almost no raging fan-girls.

But that's beside the point; the whole point is one single question; why is Kakashi banging the entire wall, once again, with a stapler. It was hardly any time at all before Iruka was swinging his way into the room, glaring at Kakashi who by that time was sitting at his desk-per the usual routine- acting as if nothing at all was going on.

Sasuke considered many options to his question. Perhaps Kakashi is just bored? The sick fuck does like to mess with people.

" !" Iruka nearly yelled, a vein protruding from his neck as he held back, Kakashi very promptly ignored him as he flipped another page. Without warning, Iruka slammed the book shut and out of Kakashi's grasp. Bending over the desk, his hands supporting him as the book lay abandoned near his right thumb, Kakashi's left foot hovering under his chin, Iruka attempted to angrily whisper. Not that this mattered to Sasuke who sat in the front row with in the only seat closest to the teacher's desk, which wasn't his choice but still held plenty of perks. "Listen to me right now; my students are trying to test."

"Is that an appropriate look Iruka?" Kakashi interrupted, leaning forward as far as his legs would allow with a menacing stare.

Flabbergasted,the teacher proceeded slowly, "What look?"

"The incredibly enticing one mocking me right now, do you usually make up reasons to flirt with members of staff for no good reason?" Kakashi's expression remained serious as Iruka's face slowly heated up with a blush, his eyes going wide in shock.

"W-w-w-WHAT?!" Iruka instantly grabbed every student's attention, he looked into the crowd remembering where he was, turning back to Kakashi he continued to whisper to the best of his ability, "There was defiantly banging going on in here, my students even complained."

Kakashi tilted his head to the side, looking around Iruka to address the class, "Students, have any of you been banging on the walls."

Everyone answered with a mountain of "no's" and head shakes; leaving Iruka in the most helpless state imaginable as he could not detect a single lie in their answers. His eyes flickered from the class to Kakashi, bouncing back and forth rapidly as he bit down on the corner of his mouth.

"You know Iruka…" started Kakashi, one eye-brow raised pointedly, "this is very inappropriate and naughty behavior on your part. You have accused my very innocent students; no wait _our_ very innocent students, of committing an atrocious act! Not only that, but you have disturbed the learning environment I have worked very hard to create…."

"I'm sorry." Iruka interrupted with a mumble, but Kakashi waved it around as he continued to speak over him.

"…and for what? So that you can flirt with me?" at this statement, Iruka's face heated up once again worsening that feeling of hopelessness, he shook his head fanatically as Kakashi's voice steadily grew with each word, "This naughty behavior of yours needs to be corrected, when hitting on a co-worker you simply start out by approaching the person of interest and state, "Would you like to go out on a date with me this Friday at eleven thirty to catch a movie and have dinner?" Say it!"

Iruka's head swung back and forth as he could only repeat the words directed at him, "W-Would you like to go out a date with me this Friday at eleven thirty to catch movie and have dinner?"

"Sure this is my address." Kakashi replied, grasping the other teachers hand and slapping a piece of paper into his grasp, "Don't be late, now please leave." Iruka stared at his hand for a full minute, confused, as he slowly turned around and exited the room. Not once glancing at the seemingly bored teacher flipping through the pages of his worn book.

Kakashi noticed Sasuke gaping at the incident the second the door shut, with a smile he reached into the drawer closest to him and pulled out a long paddle, "Next time I'll give you a better show."

"Gross." Sasuke retaliated, returning to his stoic expression, "You did all that just to set up a date?"

Kakashi shrugged as the class resumed its usual habits, "What could I do? Iruka is always too busy for me to start a conversation with; this seemed to be the only way. I don't mind, it was more fun this way."

"This was more fun for you?" Sasuke concurred, he was indeed correct. Kakashi was a sick fuck that enjoyed messing with people. "Wow, why not take your own advice for once Kakashi."

"No one who gives good advice listens to their own advice, that's why it's called good advice." His teacher explained, stretching in his chair, "Only a person who makes mistakes can tell you what to do."

"So then are you a person who makes mistakes teacher?" Sasuke sneered back, thinking that he had one-upped him.

"I'm a teacher." Kakashi replied, gesturing around, "What do you think? Not that I regret it, some people enjoy teaching and why not? They get to corrupt the minds of our nation's future for a pay check; which reminds me there is something I have to talk to you about."

"What?" Sasuke approached cautiously, not liking the sound of something to talk about besides Kakashi's crazy.

"Well you see, during a brief chat over the phone with your mother earlier today, we both came to the same conclusion. Sasuke, you have the lowest grade out of everyone in all of my classes and so, to help you achieve better grades before the end of the school year, I and your mother have decided a tutor will be best." Kakashi examined the strangely silent Sasuke as his words soaked into that thick skull. "So every Tuesday and Thursday, you will come after school where Naruto will tutor you."

And that was all it took. "Naruto?! He's the worst in the entire grade level!"

Kakashi smirked, "No Sasuke, he_ was _the worst in the entire grade level. Now that's you. But you really aren't thinking are you? Aren't you having the hardest time writing that letter?" his teacher sent him a knowing look as he glared into the wall, refusing to answer. "In that case, exposure to the topic shouldn't be a problem."

As usual, his only agreement was the slam of the door banging against its frame as he exited the room with prayers of the teacher's untimely demise.

But only the good die young, too bad for Sasuke.

* * *

**Did you guys know that I got publish recently O-o in a magazine! One (or maybe two, they didn't tell me if they were doing both or just one?) of my short stories~~! :D Evil mustache claims my books next….if I'm ever happy with them.**

**Oh lets face, that will _never _happen.**

**But that's why bearhumpinghoneyeatingslapper is always around with a spanking on her threat list….LOVE U! DON'T HIT ME! :D**

**REVIEW**


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